Jeep... the other woman.
Passed On By Shawn Pagan

   

Jeep… the other woman.

I was driving through a 4 wheel drive event a few months back when I noticed the side of a Jeep CJ and it read - Jeep …  the other woman. 

I started to think about it.  Then it dawned on me how true this statement may be.  (I apologize to other wheelers who don’t drive Jeeps.. this may apply to you as well – simply substitute Toy or Scout or whatever you drive for Jeep).   Think about it from this perspective…

You have to save money to take care of “it”.  On a weekly or monthly basis you do more work “repairing” or “upgrading” your 4 wheel drive then most people spend maintaining their cars in a year.  You plan for bonuses and what new addition you will have for your toy.  Other than food, clothing and the occasional bouquet of Roses… who gets more stuff during the month; your jeep or your wife? 

“It” has a place in your family. “It” may even have an allowance (see previous paragraph).  I know “it” sleeps in the garage while other lesser vehicles have to tough it out on the driveway. If you have kids they all know about; they know that “it” is yours and not to touch it.  In fact I’ll bet your wife rolls her eyes at the mention of the word “Toy”.   In fact I would bet that hour by hour and month by month you spend at least ½ your free time in the garage massaging and pampering your jeep…  How much time did you spend last month pampering your wife?

You plan vacations with “it”.  “Do we have to go to Margaret’s this year?  Wait can we do that and then sweep over to Paragon Adventure Park on the way back?” – note: Paragon Adventure Park is 600 Miles in the wrong direction!  What you take with you becomes very important in the relationship – as in “It’s the CJ, that table AIN’T gonna fit.”  I know you ain’t a real jeeper if the following words have never come from your wife “All right, but I’m done sleeping on the ground.  You better reserve a hotel if you want me to go!” Not that this is a bad thing; it simply becomes a fact that you don’t want to leave home without the jeep.  However I would bet that there are many a 3-day weekend that you and the jeep take a little trip and the wife stays home with the kids (or in my case she sends them with me too!).

You can’t really explain to anybody who “it” is. You have tried and tried to tell your co-workers about it. They just look at you with a knowing grin (that says you should be committed) and shake their heads.  They honestly want you to compare their BMW and Lexus SUV’s with yours.   They just don’t understand, they like their elevated station wagons.   

You will drive 800 miles in 2 days with at least one 12 hour straight stretch of driving to spend as little as 6 hours on a trail; mostly working on someone else’s jeep; then turn around the next day and drive the 800 miles back… (The 6 hours must have been worth it).  Try explaining that to your divorce attorney… 

What more proof do you need? 

Jeep … the other woman.  Need I say more!?

- Shawn Pagan